Life’s many unpaid jobs.

Duck Feathers Mothers Day

Life’s many unpaid jobs.


Notes on Mother’s Day as a single mom:  I am a single mom.   It is a common term in modern day, but not all of my friends, family, and old co-workers seem to understand what it means.  It is always hard to know when to let yourself post motherhood on the Internet, because it causes issues.   I have had to get over that issue.   It may chase off guys that dislike kids.  Yet my friends mention that this type of guy is the sort of person you WANT to drive away.  Still you fear the situation where this may become the one deal-breaker.


It was hard enough to date when all I had to worry about was my outfit.  A million personality flaws could get in the way even at that point.  Now I not only have to meet a nice guy who likes me for me, is not stupid, likes art I like, looks past my personality flaws or injuries, looks past any odd part of my life I may be in, I am attracted to him, and he is attracted to me.  Hope on a date that he choses me when there are millions of rich and free women out there to compete with me.  All the challenges footloose and free women must deal with in life.


Dating is harder when you’re a single mom.  In addition to all the normal stresses as a single mom I have to be job interviewing him all date long for the unpaid job he will automatically have of daycare worker in my home.   If we date and move in together, he is the babysitter half the time!   Child care is not something any guy is hyper for doing. There are a lot of guys I might have considered a “maybe” on dates when I was younger that I will not let be around my kid now.  If you meet a nice guy at a nightclub or party, a single mom may leave a guy she is thinking about dating an object like a jacket, coin purse, or necklace they placed in the guy’s car.  Then she pays close attention.  That was a test.  If they forget it and never return it for months what are they going to do around a kid who needs to be picked up from soccer practice or school? Forget them too? In freezing ice rain? That jacket is a metaphor for all the things they will fail at taking care of in life.  That happened to me some months ago with a DJ from downtown.   The guy’s friends hated me for refusing to date the guy.  He was being an idiot!  Many things can get in the way of happiness.  It makes becoming a non-single mom a lot harder than some people seem to think.


In addition I am in an injury lawsuit right now.  If anyone involved happens to peek at my Facebook or other pages, I would like to point out a case win for me is also a case win for the household budget of my tiny baby daughter. She did not choose to have a sick mommy.



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